


Napoleon's Ruined Suit

by Morganaismyqueen



Category: The Man From U.N.C.L.E. (2015)
Genre: M/M, Napollya - Freeform, Sharing Clothes, gaby bein cool and ditching illya for a hookup
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-13
Updated: 2016-01-13
Packaged: 2018-05-13 13:12:19
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,560
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5709451
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Morganaismyqueen/pseuds/Morganaismyqueen
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>He had chosen to simply wear his robe and nothing else for the time being and left the bedroom only to find a very much still present Illya sitting on the couch watching television with as much interest as one would hope to get from him and drinking what Napoleon assumed was his scotch. Napoleon only hesitated for a moment before continuing, its not like it really matter what Illya saw anyways and the robe covered him, so he went and poured himself a drink before sitting to the right of Illya on the comfortable chair there and leaned his head back to relax only opening his eyes after what he felt was a very long period of silence to see Illya looking at him rather oddly so Napoleon did what he does best. </p><p> He said a vaguely inappropriate and uncomfortable thing. "See something you like, Peril?"</p>
            </blockquote>





	Napoleon's Ruined Suit

**Author's Note:**

> I feel like this is a bit disjointed but I think its tolerable? im sorry if it is. I'm running on little sleep and a ridiculous amount of homework and its the first week back at classes *shrug emoji* as always kudos/comments are v appreciated!!  
> *because of anon prompt over on my tumblr*

Napoleon and Illya had been waiting here in the bushes for the contact for what felt like hours to Napoleon but the hands on Illya's watch told him that it had only been about an hour and that they probably had at least another one to go, Napoleon took a deep breath to say something to Illya and Illya sharply turned his head to stare at Napoleon and he took it for the message it was and leaned back onto his heels yet again. Gaby needed to hurry up with this meeting, his knees were starting to ache.

As soon as the meeting had begun, Napoleon could tell something was off. The man was ever so slightly more distant than he ought to be in this situation and Gaby was probably in more danger than she really needed to be right now and he sighed, he really didn't want to go crawling through all this mud and muck if he could help it but he could see Illya tensing up out of the corner of his eye and he knew that meant they were about to go swooping in to make sure nothing terrible happened to the little chop shop girl and his suit was about to get absolutely ruined.

Nothing ever seemed to go according to plan every single time UNCLE was involved (and therefore, Napoleon, Gaby and Illya) and this was the third suit in just as many weeks that had been wrecked on a mission and while Gaby and Illya had yet again been playing a married couple and were sharing a room, it was his room they had all wound up in after the fact. Gaby carefully cleaning the cuts on Illya's arms (from the knife fight he had briefly engaged in before snapping the mans neck) and muttering to herself in German under her breath while Napoleon decided he was going to rid himself of yet another perfectly nice suit gone down the drain and take a shower. (he could feel the mud he'd been knocked down into caking and he was beyond disgusted at the entire situation) He took off his suit with a look of disappointment and kicked it into a corner as he climbed under the hot water.

Napoleon knew he hadn't taken a very long shower, just long enough to wash the worst of the mud and everything else off. He was really looking forward to a few stiff drinks and sleeping for an obscenely long time before they were able to leave tomorrow night. It was only at this precise moment that Napoleon realized that he hadn't brought any clothing into the bathroom with him and he sighed and grabbed a towel from the rack and wandered out to find something (he hoped) to wear that wasn't disgusting or ruined. He heard a dull noise of the television being on in the living room but he didn't hear Illya or Gaby anymore, he had to assume they had left for the night and he couldn't say he wasn't slightly relieved at that seeing as he could find no other clean clothing and he was going to have to pretty much run around his rooms naked all night (not that he minded) and get ahold of hotel services and see if they could send someone to find something casual for him to wear tomorrow.

He had chosen to simply wear his robe and nothing else for the time being and left the bedroom only to find a very much still present Illya sitting on the couch watching television with as much interest as one would hope to get from him and drinking what Napoleon assumed was his scotch. Napoleon only hesitated for a moment before continuing, its not like it really matter what Illya saw anyways and the robe covered him, so he went and poured himself a drink before sitting to the right of Illya on the comfortable chair there and leaned his head back to relax only opening his eyes after what he felt was a very long period of silence to see Illya looking at him rather oddly so Napoleon did what he does best. 

He said a vaguely inappropriate and uncomfortable thing. "See something you like, Peril?"

Illya rolled his eyes and turned back away from Napoleon but Napoleon could've sworn he saw a slight coloration to his cheeks (could be the alcohol his mind supplied but he felt that was only part of it) and now he was wondering where Gaby had gotten off too...

"Where'd Gaby go?" He asked as he took a long drink of his very full glass of scotch

Illya smiled slightly over at him "She said she found bellboy attractive and that I should stay out of room tonight. 'For both our sakes' apparently."

Napoleon snorted, good for Gaby, nice to get out there every once and awhile but that did mean he had a room-mate tonight and wasn't that just obnoxious. Oh well, not as though Illya was ever going to look at him twice anyways and he would be going to sleep soon enough so it didn't really matter to him.

An hour later Illya and Napoleon were watching some local Spanish television show that neither of them seemed to truly care for (Illya wasn't fluent in Spanish and Napoleon was simply not invested) but they were still drinking and that was what mattered. It was right about then when Illya stood up and mumbled something about needing a shower and wandered towards the bathroom door and since it was so very quiet, Napoleon decided he should probably just head to bed now and had successfully made it there when he heard cursing and a great deal of unhappy sounds and he laughed a bit to himself before drifting off to sleep to the sounds of a drunk Illya trying to shower calmly.

The next morning he only needed to glance out the bedroom door of his suite to find Illya sleeping on the couch which was far too small for him (it was adorable, not that Napoleon was going to say that outloud...probably) and noticed that apparently Gaby had brought Illya's bag to his room last night at some point so Illya was actually dressed for bed and he looked...soft in his sleep. Napoleon had such a fascination with Illya's sleeping face, it was so kind and innocent looking until he woke up and threatened to maim you for staring at him and with that thought, Napoleon turned and kept walking as quietly as he could manage so as to not wake Illya and got to the bathroom with a feeling of relief and turned the water on, and promptly remembered right then that he never called the hotel service desk and even if he did so right now nothing would be done for at least an hour or two and he sighed a little and looked around the room for a moment.

Illya had left his clothing in here last night, it looked like he had thrown most of his things on the counter and stumbled to bed soon after his shower last night...well...Napoleon would only need to wear Illya's things for a brief time to go and head out for a brief shopping trip to find something to wear until they got back to HQ, he could probably go out and do that before Illya even woke up and realized what Napoleon had done...although Illya's pants would be too big for him so he probably wouldn't be able to wear those but...

Napoleon took his shower and quietly slipped on Illya's dress shirt from the previous evening (they had dressed to go to a party and things had been re-arranged much to both of their annoyance, especially now) and his own boxers from the previous evening and padded out to the living room to sneak out at least into the hallway to snatch a maid and ask for her to run out or something of the sort

Only to run into a very much awake and unhappy looking Illya who glanced at him for a moment before looking away and back at the floor and then...swiftly looking back at him in confusion

"Cowboy, are you wearing my shirt?"

Napoleon looked up at the ceiling, in a silent prayer that this conversation not turn violent for any reason or something, he was too hungover and partially naked for this. "I am, Peril. I needed something to wear to go fetch a maid and it was the first thing that was clean and there. You left it on the bathroom counter last night."

It...honestly looked like Illya was checking him out, but that honestly couldn't have been true. Could it?

Illya licked his lips and looked back at the floor before walking out of the living room back into the bathroom himself and shouted something at Napoleon through the door that sounded like "You better get something else to wear because I want my shirt back this afternoon, Cowboy!"

Napoleon never gave it back because he liked the reaction he got from Illya and was curious about its continuation but more importantly, Illya never asked for it back and seemed to enjoy it very much when he saw Napoleon in it.


End file.
